


after all these years

by intergalacticships (thelesterhowells)



Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Happy Ending, Hopeful Ending, It's a little sad, M/M, Malex
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-24
Updated: 2019-02-24
Packaged: 2019-11-04 22:58:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,981
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17907293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thelesterhowells/pseuds/intergalacticships
Summary: (Set right after 1x05)“You said,” Isobel interrupted his thought process, “that we should tell the people we loved.”Michael turned to look at her expectantly.“But Max already told Liz and all the people you love know it too? You don’t even like the people in this town, Michael,” she stated, confusion very apparent in her voice.





	after all these years

**Author's Note:**

> thank you so much, rai [(@alexmanes)](https://alexmanes.tumblr.com/), for beta reading this! <3
> 
> hope you enjoy :)

Seeing Isobel this sad and hopeless broke Michael’s heart into pieces. It’s been a long time since he had to be there for her and not the other way around. And he really desperately wanted to be here for her right now. Isobel has always been a safe haven for Michael and Max, she was always there for them without a question and without a doubt. She ditched Noah endless of times to help one of them and knowing that he couldn’t help  _ her _ now was unbearable for him. Seeing her cry, seeing her marriage fall apart right in front of him, was devastating.

He had no idea what to do, what to say, or how to make her feel better, but there was one constant thought running through his mind:  _ “We can’t keep doing this. We just can’t.”  _ He was convinced that Isobel should tell Noah the truth, try and save her marriage and not lose the love of her life. 

He’d been thinking about this for quite some time now, but it was the first time that he said it out loud.

“Maybe it’s time we all tell the truth to the people we love,” Michael said, carefully and quietly.

Isobel turned to look at him with a red face and puffy eyes.

“Yeah,” she said, voice wavering. She sounded so broken, and it was then that Michael knew that it was time, that something was about to change. He thought about all the times this secret destroyed something in their lives. After years upon years of hiding, he was done letting this consume him.

It was silent between them for a while, both completely lost in their own thoughts. 

Golden, sun-kissed skin, messy hair and bright, brown eyes overflowing with love and passion kept appearing in front of Michael’s eyes. He couldn’t understand the reaction his heart had, he couldn’t wrap his mind around his feelings because rationally they didn’t make any sense. He knew that. He had no idea how his heart thought that the last 10 years just didn’t happen. 

But there was nothing he could do. Because of every time he thought of Alex, it made his heart ache. Because every time he thought of Alex, his heartbreak was there again, almost as intense as on the first day and he would do everything to make it go away. Because every time he thought of Alex, he wished he could help him to feel loved again. Because every time he thought of Alex, he just wanted to hold him and be held by him. Like it was all those years ago. 

“You said,” Isobel interrupted his thought process, “that we should tell the people we loved.” 

Michael turned to look at her expectantly. 

“But Max already told Liz and all the people you love know it too? You don’t even  _ like  _ the people in this town, Michael,” she stated, confusion very apparent in her voice. 

“No, yeah. I mean, I just meant you should tell Noah. You know? Because he deserves to know and...yeah.” He tried, he really did, but he couldn’t even lie to himself anymore. So how could he lie to Isobel? 

“Please don’t lie to me, Michael. Not now.” The sadness and desperation in her voice, the tears in her eyes, made him second guess his secrecy. On one hand, he didn’t want to disappoint Alex. n the other, how could he continue lying to his own sister? He trusted her more than himself sometimes. So screw Alex’s wish of not wanting to tell anybody. Alex, who didn't want him anyway. Alex, who broke his heart.  _ Again _ . Alex, who walked away.  _ Again _ . 

“I love him so much, Isobel. I had no idea that I could love a human being this much,” he admitted, mouth dry and throat tense. It almost came out as a croak, no thanks to his nerves. 

She immediately walked over and sat down next to him. She didn’t ask anything, didn’t pressure him. She just put his arm around Michael, pulled him close, and waited. 

“I hadn't seen him for ten years. We literally broke up over ten years ago, Isobel,” he scoffed. “I don’t even know why it feels like nothing happened in between. But so much happened. And now he is back and I just...I couldn't resist him. I just couldn’t.” 

Isobel pulled him even closer, kissed him on top his head, and rested her chin there. 

“Alex, hm?” Isobel asked, and Michael nodded. “It makes so much sense now. He was the only other person you hung out with in high school.” 

He just laughed at that. “Yeah, I don’t really like the people in this shithole. You know that.” 

Isobel rolled her eyes, Michael could almost feel it. “How did I miss this?” 

“We were good at hiding it. We had to. Alex’s dad...he probably would've killed us. He hated that Alex wasn’t like him. It was rough,” he quietly explained. “But he sent him off to war in the end...He got what he wanted.” Even thinking about this made Michael fill with rage. He hated Jesse Manes with every fiber of his being. 

“Alex didn’t want to enlist himself, did he?” Isobel actually sounded concerned for past Alex, almost as she was wishing she knew about this back then. To change something, do something, or just be there for the two of them. 

“No, he didn’t. We wanted to go away. Never come back. Never look back. But then everything went to fucking hell and...now here we are.” 

“Michael, are you sure that he doesn’t feel the same? I mean, thinking about everything and especially the last few days, are you sure?” 

Michael’s mind immediately went to the drive-in. 

_ This won’t work. I’m an airman. I can’t be with a criminal.  _

And he wished he could just forget. 

“I’m sure,” Michael said, so self-assured in the finality of his words. 

As he sat up, Isobel covered his scarred hand with both of hers and looked him in the eyes, the worry and affection plain in sight. 

“I think you should talk to him.” Michael began to shake his head. “No, hear me out. I know you. It took you over ten years to open up to your sister. Things happened, you both changed a lot. You  _ need  _ to talk. Think about it, but don’t rush it. Talk to him at some point, even if it’s just to get closure.” 

She moved one of her hands to his cheek and looked at him expectantly until he closed his eyes and nodded. 

“Alright. Let’s get some rest now. We both need some rest. Come on,” she encouraged, standing up and holding her hand out for Michael to take it. 

\---

It was a few days later when Michael was sitting in his trailer, working on some of the chemical equations he had pinned to his wall, but he couldn’t concentrate on anything. His mind drifted away every few minutes and he knew he needed to talk to Alex. At this point, it wasn’t even about getting him back or making it work. It was about peace of mind. 

He stood up before he could change his mind, grabbed his jacket, and swung the door open, only to find Alex pacing around right in front of it. He looked up, eyes widening and making him look like a deer caught in the headlights. 

“Hi?” Michael offered.

“Hi, I—I wanted to…” 

Michael waited a few moments, but Alex didn't continue to talk. He stayed silent and just looked at Michael. Intensely. 

“Alex, what are you doing here?” 

“I honestly have no idea.” He looked so sincere and lost while saying it that it made Michael’s stomach drop. He could see that Alex was hurting too and actually  _ knowing _ that changed so much. 

“Alright. Come on then, Manes.” Michael motioned in the direction of the chairs standing outside and started walking towards them.

They stayed quiet for a while until Alex started to talk in an almost whispered voice.

“I’ve been thinking a lot about you, y’know. About us,” Alex said and looked up to face Michael. “Even when we were worrying about my dad, it was so much easier to talk back in high school, wasn’t it? We had a plan to escape and be together and now...now we’ve changed. You’re still here. I’m back. It’s so different and yet the same and I...I just don’t know what to think.” 

Michael was suddenly overwhelmed. They shared so many intimate and intense moments back in high school. They shared everything with each other and it’s been ten years since he heard Alex share his sincere emotions and feelings. It’s been ten years since Michael let himself be vulnerable with somebody and to his surprise, it felt freeing. So he decided to take the risk and just talk. 

“I know what you mean. You know that I feel the same. I can’t stop thinking about all of this either, but I have no fucking clue what to do.” 

Alex looked at him with shock evident on his face, almost as if he wasn’t expecting Michael would be honest with him. 

“I have issues, Michael, and you do too. But I’ve always felt safe around you. Still do. I don’t want to lose that...I was thinking maybe we could try?” 

Michael liked how that sounded, but he definitely needed some type of safety, “What about your dad?” 

“I can’t keep living my life how he wants it. I already did that a couple of times and we know where it brought me to. I just wanna do what I want.” 

“You sure you can be with a criminal, Manes?” 

Alex grinned at him, “Oh yeah, I’m definitely sure, Guerin.”

And with that Michael stood up, walked over to Alex, and pulled him up. He cupped his cheeks with both of his hands and looked him in the eyes, giving him the time to back away. But Alex never did. Instead, he leaned in and put the arm that was not using the crutch around Michael’s waist.

It was pure muscle memory that pushed them together. The kiss was filled with so much desire and hunger it was almost unbearable. Michael couldn't understand how a kiss could hold so many emotions and so many feelings, yet he was putting them all into that kiss and receiving them in return. Michael moved his hands into Alex’s hair and pulling it slightly. Alex pulled him as close as possible, trying to connect every body part with each other. 

After a few minutes they separated to catch their breaths, but they stayed close by putting their foreheads together. Both of them breathing heavily and keeping their eyes shut. 

“Will you stay here tonight?” Michael knew that they had a lot to talk about. 

“Yeah,” Alex agreed, so close to Michael that he could feel his breath on his face and he loved it. He knew that they still had so much to talk about, so much to work out. But now he had clearity that Alex felt the same and wanted to make it work. That was better than anything Michael had gotten in the last ten years. 

But right now he just wanted to concentrate on making Alex feel safe and loved. To pull Alex close and fall asleep with Alex’s warmth around him. Right now, he wanted to concentrate on waking up beside the only person he ever loved and to watch how beautiful he looked when the morning sun met with his golden skin and made him glow like a creature not of this world. Right now, he wanted to concentrate on feeling like he belonged here again, and he knew the only person who could make him feel like that was Alex.

**Author's Note:**

> [come and say hi and maybe reblog on tumblr](https://intergalacticships.tumblr.com/post/183025277145/after-all-these-years) :)


End file.
